A bloke tries to get into a nightclub.
The bouncer says, "not without a tie, mate."
The bloke goes back to his car to find a tie but can only find a set of jump-leads.
He thinks, "fuck it, I'll tie 'em round me neck and see what happens."
The man goes back to the club and says, "can I come in now?"
Looking at the jump-leads, the bouncer says, "okay, mate, but don't fucking start anything."